Can listeners SEE your value?

Our message is not only what we say, but how we say it. Verbally and non-verbally. What do listeners remember after you walk away?

Last week you may have read my post about how to ensure people do remember you, recognizing that distraction and forgetfulness is part of life. This week, let’s address the core barrier to a positive memory.

If someone asked you “what’s so important about you?”, how would you respond? With a chortle? A tilted head? A ready reply? In reality, most people keep that question in their head but they still look for the answer when they’re with you.

Our value is a combination of our ideas, the experiences we give folks, how we relate and what we do. We learn of people’s value at funerals when those left behind recall their experiences with the deceased. And during those times some of us (I know I do) reflect for ourselves – “what would people say of me if I were the one in that coffin?”

Humbling post, I know, yet there’s no time like now to consider our legacy or our value to those around us. Others are. They need to manage employees, assist with professional development, consider new vendors, referral sources or who to let go.

Point-blank self-promotion requires us to have a gut-check of how to say things without coming across differently than we’d like.

While running your web camera ask yourself this question – What’s so important about you?  And answer the question. Play back the recording. Listen to what you say but also see how you respond.

Is it the way you’d like? Better yet, is it the way folks who really want to know your value would like to see you respond?

When we forget our value, we waste time by fumbling around with thoughts or behaviors not in keeping with what’s important to us. And listeners and observers notice. These barriers become top of mind to them instead of our value. However, when we remember our value – maybe it has to do with our ideas or research or work ethic – and also remember not to exploit it, we reduce stress and keep from disrespecting others.

So do this. Ask what’s my value? Answer it. If you are shaking your head, or at a loss for words, keep going. Until you can calmly or convincingly respond, keep going. If it requires you to dig deep, then do so. Do this with a web camera recording you so you can get used to having eyes on you while addressing the topic. And you can see your behavior as well as hear your responses.

Break down the barriers to the legacy you desire. You are going to be remembered in some way. When you keep in mind what to say and how to say it, you keep a positive memory top of mind.

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